Hanover Square 汉诺威广场--- 追忆似水年华

来源:可可英语 2019-03-20

我们初次相遇,难道真的是六十二年前吗?
年华似水,倏忽间我们已相携一世。望着你的眼睛,当年的邂逅历历如在昨昔,就在汉诺威广场的那间小咖啡馆里。
从见到你的那一刻起,那一刻你正为一位年轻的母亲和她的小宝宝开门,那一刻当看到你的盈盈笑靥,我就明白我只愿与你执手携老,共度今生。
我仍然不时想起,那天自己那样地盯着你,一定很傻;就那样情不自禁怔怔地望着你,追随你摘下小帽,用手指松了松短短的黑发,追随你把帽子放在桌前,双手捧起暖暖的茶杯,追随你微撅樱唇,轻轻吹走飘腾的热气,我的目光始终追随着你,感觉自己在你的温柔举止间慢慢融化。
从那一刻起,一切似乎都鲜明了意义。咖啡馆里的来来往往和外面闹市的熙熙攘攘忽然都模糊了起来,我眼里能看到的,只有你。
光阴似箭,那一天却不断在我的记忆里重演,鲜活如初。多少次我再次坐下,不断追忆那天的点滴,不断回味那些飞纵的瞬间,重新体会一见钟情的美丽。岁月的流逝却并没有带走我的爱恋感觉,这些体验会永远伴随我,安抚我的寥寥余生。
即 使是当我在战壕中控制不住地颤抖,我也不曾忘记你的容颜。我蜷缩在稀泥中,身边是枪林弹雨,弥漫硝烟,我把步枪紧紧地攥在胸前,一颗惊恐不安的心,还是想 起了我们初识的那一天。身旁战火呼啸,恐惧让我想要大声呼叫,直到想起你,仿佛见到你在我身后盈盈浅笑,战场忽然沉寂下来,在这珍贵的瞬间,我觉得自己暂 时远离了毁灭和死亡,飞向你的身旁。我拼命想留住这美好,直到睁开眼,周围却依然是血与火的生死战场。
九月休假回到你身边,我疲惫而脆弱,没能再告诉你战火纷飞时我对你的爱有多深。我们只能紧紧拥抱在一起,仿佛要把对方挤碎。也就在那天,面对我的求婚,你深深凝望我的眼睛,答应做我的新娘,而我早已欢喜地大喊大叫。
我 现在正看着我们的结婚照片,总是放在妆台上的那张,就在你的首饰盒旁。那时候,我们多么年轻,多么纯真。我记得我们站在教堂的台阶上,开心得像一对甜蜜的 鸳鸯,你还说我穿着制服多么英武俊朗。照片已经旧得泛黄了,但我看到的,却只有当年青春的明媚姿彩。我仍然记得你母亲为你做的那件新娘礼服,那些精致的花 边和漂亮的珠饰。让我再想一想,我还能闻到那婚礼花束的甜香,你那么骄傲地捧着花,让每一个人分享你的幸福时光。
一年后,你轻轻地把我的手放到你的腹前,对着我的耳朵悄悄透露这个让我欣喜若狂的好消息:我们就快有宝宝啦。
我知道我们的孩子都深深地爱你,他们现在就在门外等候。
你还记得乔纳森出生的时候我那手足无措的慌张样子吗?当我笨拙地把他抱在怀里,我还记得你笑话我的样子,我看着他,我们都情不自禁地迸出了开心的泪花。
今 天早晨撒拉和汤姆带着小缇西也赶到了。你还记得吗?第一次看到这个可爱的小孙女,我俩高兴地紧紧拥抱。真让人难以相信,她下个月就八岁了。亲爱的,我不得 不忍住眼泪告诉你,小家伙今天穿着漂亮的裙子,闪亮的红色小鞋,让我立刻想起当年相遇时的你,连她的短发也像极了年轻的你。当我在门口看到她的时候,她的 笑容暖人心脾,这竟然也和你一模一样。
我明白,亲爱的,你累了,我应该让你离开。可是爱人即逝,孤侣何伤!
这些年我们相濡以沫,白首到 老,我总是逗你说你的容颜依然如昔。可这是真的,亲爱的,我真的见不到他人眼里的皱纹和白发。现在我望着你,也还是只能看到你娇嫩温柔的红唇和秋水流盼的 眼眸,仿佛我们第一次在那条小溪边野餐,在那棵巨大的老橡树旁追逐嬉戏。那时候我们刚刚在一起,总是盼望那样的日子生生世世,你还记得吗?那些日子是多么 激情荡漾,让人不忍回首……
亲爱的,我应该走了。孩子们都等在外面,他们要和你道别。
我擦去了眼角的泪,跪在你的身边,轻轻靠近你,握住你的双手,最后一次吻你。
亲爱的,安心地睡吧。
这分离扯碎了我的心。别担心,我很快就会来陪伴你。生死茫茫,尘世间没有你,这满腔的衷肠凭谁倾诉?这只影的寂寥复有何欢?
很快,我们就能在汉诺威广场的那间小咖啡馆里再相逢。
再会了,我的爱妻。

Can itreallybesixty-twoyearsagothatIfirstsawyou?

Itistrulyalifetime, Iknow. ButasIgazeintoyoureyesnow, itseemslikeonlyyesterdaythatIfirstsawyou, inthatsmallcafé inHanoverSquare.

FromthemomentIsawyousmile, asyouopenedthedoorforthatyoungmotherandhernewbornbaby. Iknew. IknewthatIwantedtosharetherestofmylifewithyou.

IstillthinkofhowfoolishImusthavelooked, asIgazedatyou, thatfirsttime. Irememberwatchingyouintently, asyoutookoffyourhatandlooselyshookyourshortdarkhairwithyourfingers. Ifeltmyselfbecomingimmersedinyoureverydetail, asyouplacedyourhatonthetableandcuppedyourhandsaroundthehotcupoftea, gentlyblowingthesteamawaywithyourpoutedlips.

Fromthatmoment, everythingseemedtomakeperfectsensetome. Thepeopleinthecafé andthebusystreetoutsidealldisappearedintoahazyblur. AllIcouldseewasyou.

AllthroughmylifeIhaverelivedthatveryfirstday. Many, manytimesIhavesatandthoughtaboutthatthefirstday, andhowforafewfleetingmomentsIamthere, feelingagainwhatisliketoknowtruelovefortheveryfirsttime. ItpleasesmethatIcanstillhavethosefeelingsnowafterallthoseyears, andIknowIwillalwayshavethemtocomfortme.

NotevenasIshookandtrembleduncontrollablyinthetrenches, didIforgetyourface. Iwouldsithuddledintothewetmud, terrified, asthehailsofbulletsandmortarscrasheddownaroundme. Iwouldclutchmyrifletightlytomyheart, andthinkagainofthatveryfirstdaywemet. Iwouldcryoutinfear, asthenoiseofwarbeatdownaroundme. But, asIthoughtofyouandsawyousmilingbackatme, everythingaroundmewouldbebecomesilent, andIwouldbewithyouagainforafewpreciousmoments, farfromthedeathanddestruction. ItwouldnotbeuntilIopenedmyeyesonceagain, thatIwouldseeandhearthecarnageofthewararoundme.

Icannottellyouhowstrongmyloveforyouwasbackthen, whenIreturnedtoyouonleaveintheSeptember, feelingbattered, bruisedandfragile. WeheldeachothersotightIthoughtwewouldburst. IaskedyoutomarrymetheverysamedayandIwhoopedwithjoywhenyoulookeddeepintomyeyesandsaid "yes" tobeingmybride.

I`mlookingatourweddingphotonow, theoneonourdressingtable, nexttoyourjewellerybox. Ithinkofhowyoungandinnocentwewerebackthen. IrememberbeingonthechurchstepsgrinninglikeaCheshirecat, whenyousaidhowdashingandhandsomeIlookedinmyuniform. Thephotoisoldandfadednow, butwhenIlookatit, Ionlyseethebrightvibrantcolorsofouryouth. Icanstillremembereverydetailoftheprettyweddingdressyourmothermadeforyou, withitsfinedelicatelaceandprettypearls. IfIconcentratehardenough, Icansmellthesweetnessofyourweddingbouquetasyouhelditsoproudlyforeveryonetosee.

Irememberbeingsooverenjoyed, whenayearlater, yougentlyheldmyhandtoyourwaistandwhisperedinmyearthatweweregoingtobeafamily.

Iknowbothourchildrenloveyoudearly; theyareoutsidethedoornow, waiting.

DoyourememberhowIpanickedlikeamadmanwhenJonathonwasborn? Icanstillpictureyoulaughingandsmilingatmenow, asIclumsilyheldhimfortheveryfirsttimeinmyarms. Iwatchedasyourlaughterfadedintotears, asIstaredathimandcriedmyowntearsofjoy.

SarahandTomarrivedthismorningwithlittleTessie. Canyourememberhowwebothhuggedeachothertightlywhenwesawourtinygranddaughterforthefirsttime? Ican`tbelieveshewillbeeightnextmonth. Iamtryingnottocry, mylove, asItellyouhowbeautifulshelookstodayinherprettydressandredshinyshoes, sheremindsmesomuchofyouthatfirstdaywemet. Shehasherhaircutshortnow, justlikeyourswasallthoseyearsago. WhenImetheratthedoorhersmilewrappedaroundmelikeawarmglove, justlikeyoursusedtodo, mydarling.

Iknowyouaretired, mydear, andImustletyougo. ButIloveyousomuchithurtstodoso.

Aswegrewoldtogether, Iwouldteaseyouthatyouhadnotchangedsincewefirstmet. Butitistrue, mydarling. Idonotseethewrinklesandgreyhairthatotherpeoplesee. WhenIlookatyounow, Ionlyseeyoursweettenderlipsandyouthfulsparklingeyesaswesatandhadoutfirstpicnicnexttothatsmallstream, andchasedeachotheraroundthatbigoldoaktree. Irememberwishingthosefirstfewdaystogetherwouldlastforever. Doyourememberhowexcitingandwonderfulthosedayswere?

Imustgonow, mydarling. Ourchildrenarewaitingoutside. Theywanttosaygoodbyetoyou.

Iwipethetearsawayfrommyeyesandbendmyfrailoldlegsdowntothefloor, sothatIcankneelbesideyou. Ileanclosetoyouandtakeholdofyourhandandkissyourtenderlipsfortheverylasttime.

Sleeppeacefullymydear.

Iamsadthatyouhadtoleaveme, butpleasedon`tworry. Iamcontent, knowingIwillbewithyousoon. Iamtoooldandtooemptynowtolivemuchlongerwithoutyou.

Iknowitwon`tbelongbeforewemeetagaininthatsmallcafé inHanoverSquare.

Goodbye, mydarlingwife.




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